This post is aimed primarily at the locked males in the chastity relationship, but I believe it can be helpful for their keyholders as well.
My wife and I have been practicing male chastity on and off for about one and a half years, and it’s been incredibly helpful for our relationship and our sex life. However, by now I’ve learned a few things about being in chastity which I believe can be helpful knowledge to any newcomer to the practice, and I hope that by sharing them here it can be beneficial to other couples who wish to give it a try.
Of course you don’t need a chastity cage to practice male chastity, but I believe it helps tremendously. I wear a metal cage with a built in lock. It’s just small enough to prevent an erection and to remind me it’s there, but it fits comfortably enough to wear 24/7. It’s possible to do this under the honor system, but I think that the added enforcement of the cage is very helpful. Also, the cage serves as a constant reminder of my commitment to my wife to give her control over my orgasms, and we both enjoy that very much.
Five Helpful Tips for Male Chastity
In no particular order, below are a few tips and suggestions I have for other men planning to enter into such an arrangement with their significant others.
- Discuss your expectations with your partner. Do you want to stay locked for just a few days or do you envision something more long term? Are you looking to spice things up in the bedroom or are you looking to alter the power dynamic in the relationship overall? Make sure you’re both clear on these things.
- Sign a contract. My wife and I have a contract which stipulates each of our responsibilities and expectations. I agreed that she has total control over when (or whether) and how I climax, and she agreed to be a responsible keyholder by not losing the keys and by unlocking my cage if necessary for medical purposes or emergencies.
- Don’t overthink things and don’t drive your partner nuts by talking about chastity incessantly. Allow things to settle in, and let your keyholder decide when to talk about chastity. If you talk about it nonstop or constantly tell them about your experience, you risk turning them off from the practice. Give your partner the space to experience and enjoy your chastity on their terms and in their time.
- Relax and let go. Don’t obsess over when you’ll be unlocked or how long your partner will have you wait until your release. Just go with the flow and surrender yourself to their whims and desires. After all, that’s a big part of this. The more you let go and surrender to your partner’s wishes, the more relaxed you’ll both be and the more fun you’ll have.
- Instead of thinking about what YOU want, think about your partner’s needs and what THEY want. This will not only make you a better partner, it will also greatly enhance the experience of being locked in chastity.
These are just a few suggestions for how to approach the experience, and if I think of others, I’ll be sure to post them. Male chastity has greatly enhanced our relationship, and we love what it’s done for our physical intimacy. Remember to let go and go with the flow, listening to your partner’s needs and desires. Don’t let anxiety get the best of you. If you can manage that, male chastity will also greatly enhance the trust between you and your partner. In addition to the thrill and excitement, it has the power to bring you much closer together.